Messiah Muffin, European Union Grifball League Commish, compiled a summary of the EUGBL11 season.
Well for all those who don’t know, the last season of the European Grifball League has just ended. The EUGBL11 (or Winter League ’12) was a competition that ran from late November to early January and saw five teams from Europe battle it out to be known as the best in Europe.
This season let us say a congratulations to Johnson’s Salty Grifballs who won for the second season in a row, beating Sarge’s Angels in a rematch from last seasons final. This puts JSG as one of the only teams to have won multiple EUGBL seasons and now places them one win behind Grifballs of Steel who hold the current record for most wins with three to their name. However, Johnson’s Salty Grifballs do get the acknowledgment for being the only team to the win the league for two seasons in a row without losing any games. So let’s say congratulations to Messiah Muffin (yes that is me), kirsty de lacey, Hardcore Crab, DRO Praetorian, AwareMosquito, Linxx182, Strangler 999 and bigbellychimp for winning this season of the EUGBL.
Now let’s look back at the season or just skip to the bottom to find out who won this seasons Played Awards, totally not ripped off from the GGL in any shape or form. The five teams who entered this season of the EUGBL were Johnson’s Salty Grifballs, Sarge’s Angels, Team Impact, Rainbows and Unicorns and Storm Hawks. So sit comfortably and get ready for the review.
I said comfortably…
Storm Hawks suffered with problems this season and only managed to get one game played, a 9-0 loss to JSG, ending the season with forfeits against them and a record of 0-8. Rainbows and Unicorns managed to score one win in the season with a 6-3 victory over Sarge’s Angels. However they also suffered a 6-3 loss to the same team and also lost both of their games against JSG 7-2. In the end they forfeited their games against Team Impact and finished the season with a 3-7 record.
Sarge’s Angels finished the regular season with a 4-4 record, picking up wins on R&U and also Team Impact. However they also lost to both teams and failed to pick up wins over Johnson’s Salty Grifballs in a 6-3 and a 7-2 loss. However there record was judged as being good enough to see them enter the playoff for a place in the final. Team Impact finished the regular season in second place with a 5-3 record. They lost to Sarge’s Angels 5-4 but also picked up a 5-4 win of their own. However they also suffered losses to JSG but picked up a high amount of wins by forfeit to enter them into one of the playoff places for a shot at making it to the final.
Sarge’s Angels, From R/L: Gibbley Giblets, Teaguey222, Atomic hawx, Nyan Cat Nyans
Johnson’s Salty Grifballs finished up with a 8-0 record, going undefeated with wins over all their opponents and only picking up one forfeit win. Due to their record they finished in first and were automatically placed in the final. With the regular season over, the season moved into playoff season. The final would be Johnson’s Salty Grifballs against the winner of Sarge’s Angels against Team Impact.
In their third encounter of the season, the two teams put on another strong display each other and the game once again finished at the very close score of 5-4. However it was Europe’s longest running Grifball team, Sarge’s Angels, who managed to pick up the win over Europe’s second longest running active team, Team Impact. This result meant that on their tenth consecutive season, once again Sarge’s Angels would be facing Johnson’s Salty Grifballs in the final.
In a rematch of last years final between two teams who had both been conceived over three years earlier, it would prove to be Johnson’s Salty Grifballs who were the strongest team as they won the game 7-2 and became the European Grifball Champions for the second time.
EUGBL11 CHAMPIONS: Johnson’s Salty Grifballs
Johnson’s Salty Grifballs, From R/L: Hardcore Crab, kirsty de lacey, AwareMosquito, Messiah Muffin
However, even though Grifball is a team it is also important to remember some of the key players who helped their teams, or in some cases didn’t. With that in mind it is time to move onto the EUGBL11 Player Awards. These awards go to players in the league who performed at either the top level during the season, or the lowest in some cases. So let’s look at the winners of this seasons EUGBL player awards. If your wondering if these awards were around last season, they were not. But alas, here they are, the awards and their winners.
Always Active Award: Most Play Time
Messiah Muffin & Hardcore Crab (Johnson’s Salty Grifballs) – 133 Minutes
Run Forest Run Award: Most Scores Per Minute
DRO Praetorian (Johnson’s Salty Grifballs) – 1 Score Every 3 and a 1/2 Minutes
Hammer Happy Award: Most Kills Per Minute
Messiah Muffin (Johnson’s Salty Grifballs) – 4.24 Kills a Minute
Cannon Fodder Award: Most Deaths Per Minute
lolzy mcroflmao (Rainbows and Unicorns) – 4.41 Deaths a Minute
Bragging Rights Award: Biggest K/D Spread
Messiah Muffin (Johnson’s Salty Grifballs) – +211 Spread
Should Have Gone to Specsavers Award: Most Betrayals
NikorAsu XII (Rainbows and Unicorns) – 26 Betrayals
Team Player Award: Least Betrayals
Allan Pike & HALO7JET (Storm Hawks) – 0 Betrayals
Sapping My Sentry Award: Most Assassinations
Atomic hawx (Sarge’s Angels) – 2 Assassinations
Streak Blocker Award: Most Killjoys
Trampy Boy (Sarge’s Angels) – 7 Killjoys
Guys I Got This Award: Most First Strikes
Hardcore Crab (Johnson’s Salty Grifballs) – 21 First Strikes
Come on guys, let’s all have a celebratory hug to celebrate the season
With the player awards revealed, the winner known and the season over….. that’s about it. The season is over and it has been a rather quiet season this season, which I guess was good for me, but poor for your reading pleasure. You’ll have to wait for all the sex and drug scandals that are sure to rock the next season, cleverly named the EUGBL12. When will this new season be starting? Nobody knows, it is a secret to all. For now we are just concentrating on getting new teams together.
If you are a new European team then we urge you to post in the forums and get yourself involved in the league. It’s a good idea that you get to know your other teams and get used to playing league competition. Get yourself ready for the next season of EUGBL12. It will be coming eventually but for now, this is all. So this is a goodbye for now from your commissioner and Grifball idol and inspiration and Messiah Muffin. And good luck next season.
– Messiah Muffin